Proud to be an American

I have a new Most Prized Possession. So long Reggie Jackson rookie card. Sayonara grandpa’s gold pocket watch. Adios Ace of Base poster.


Dead to me.

Remember that post I wrote a while back about a little music video I ordered called America We Stand As One? Well guess what came in the mail today, about twice as fast as I thought it would?

That’s right. I haven’t been this excited since Christmas Day 1980.

Are you as tingly with anticipation as I was?

I was floored by the packaging. I thought I would get an impersonal-computer-generated-assembly-line mailer, but no. This was handwritten. Handwritten with loving care.


Could this be the handwriting of Danger himself?

A wonderful heart-balloon-shaped thing sprouting out of the “L” in “Love” was drawn on the margins of the package. Another, smaller, heart-shaped-spermy balloon floated below, and above was two 4-fingered paw print-type things. Doth my eyes deceive me, or is Madalone an ar-teest as well as a stuntman, rocker, and humanitarian?


Wherever Madalone’s name is, there is an American flag nearby.

After I documented the packaging with my digital camera, all the while giggling to myself like a schoolgirl with a secret, I grabbed the scissors and carefully opened the package.

This is when the true joy began. I expected to just dump out a DVD. But no, I also received the CD single. I had requested both with the donation I sent, but I didn’t think I would get BOTH! Dennis is so generous!

But what’s this? Wasn’t that enough? NO! Dennis actually personalized the cover of the DVD!

OH HAPPY DAY!

It reads, “AARON, YOUR HEART (heart drawing) IS (the “I” dotted with another paw print thingy) FULL OF GOODNESS (underlined twice). For All of OUR LOVED ONE’S (underlined twice). always Believe (“i” dotted with paw print). Dennis (“i” dotted with paw print) Madalone (heart balloon person thingy)”


I do Believe Dennis. I do.

But my friends, IT STILL WAS NOT OVER. He personalized the LYRICS INSERT and the actual God-blessed DVD too!

The lyrics insert reads, “AARON, Keep on Being (dotted with paw print) you (underlined twice). Love Dennis (sixth paw print and another spermy heart)”


I’ll do my best, Denny good man.

The DVD reads, “for the WORLD (underlined twice). Dennis (seventh paw print) and (heart) Linda (eighth paw print) and (heart) MOM (third spermy heart)”


I’ve never kissed a man, but I’m considering some tonsil hockey with Dennis.

Finally, I also received an America We Stand As One business card, which was also personalized, “AARON, thank you (fifth double-underline). Dennis (unprecedented ninth paw print AND fourth spermy heart)


There aren’t enough spermy hearts in the world to express my feelings, Dennis.

I know in my other post about America We Stand As One I doubted Dennis’ spiritual message from our Loved Ones. But after being touched by all of this heartfelt personalization, I really feel as if my heart is a white, fluffy cloud wherein firemen shake hands for eternity. And I didn’t even lose any Loved Ones in any of the events on 9/11 or since.

Is it fair that I feel so much love? I submit that it is not!

Dennis Madalone has made me a believer. I am converted. Thank you Dennis for restoring my faith in the human spirit. For curing me of cynicism if just for a few moments. And for giving me hope and belief in this not-so-perfect-but-damn-well-worth-standing-up-for country of ours.

A little country I like to call the USAAAAAAAYYYY!

C’mon kids! Let’s all stand as one! How ‘bout it?


Dennis, you’re a little slice of heaven, and I want the whole enchilada!

*I almost forgot*

On the DVD there is a credit track that lists everyone who worked on the making of. But the awesome part is the music that plays during the credits is a KARAOKE VERSION of America We Stand As One! So next time you come over to my apartment, guess what we're doing!